October 7th, 2006
V For the Visage of Villains & Victories
Now after the devastation of my last blog entry, I have some follow up news to go along with it. Many people, friends and even strangers, were affected by our loss of dear Spaz. On Wednesday night, we tried to resume the education of Micah on American Cinema, but I mostly just wanted to have people in the house again and reignite some of the warmth that made our happy home what it is.
I do so deeply appreciate the condolences, shared stories, sympathy, et al. One of the most effecting things was from my friend Cathy. She sent an endearing email to Brandy & I describing how the blog entry made her cry at work and that she even ran out of tissues halfway through. What separated her email from the many nice things was one particular sentence where she said, "I wish I could have re-written your story with a happy ending. " This moved me deeply.
The next day, Cathy emailed me and asked if we were interested in getting another kitty. Brandy & I had been discussing this very topic. We wanted to help out Cousette, Spaz' sister, who really realized that her brother was gone and was very lonely, so I said yes. A woman named Renee that Cathy worked with had one kitten left from a litter. I called her up and she said that this one little black 8 week old kitty was left and no one wanted him. He was the runt of the litter and very sweet. His story was all too much like Spaz', although he is very different. I said we'd take him in.
He joined our family today at 1:00PM. Sadly, Cousette is hardly thrilled about it for now… lots of hissing and lots of angry looks. In the end, she'll get used to her new baby brother and it will help her not be lonely. He's already slept in my lap and Brandy's. He's explored the world known as Rossdonia.
Thank you, Cathy. That's all we can ask for and it has helped us here in making our home happy again.
He looks eerily similar to TROUBLEMAKER from the HORRORS OF WAR shoot in Mechanicsburg, and at 8 weeks old, he's rather rambunctious. That's an understatement, he's a mountain-climber who has scaled the back of every chair in the house in less than 4 hours and goes up or down the stairs with effort, but as a giant ball of energy, manages just fine.
Brandy said I could name him, so I have. I named him "V". At least that's his nickname. He has a full name, but part of what I'll do different today in this blog is see who can guess what his first name is (hint: starts with a "V"). A free copy of THE BEST OF SONNYBOO DVD awaits the first person to guess V's entire first name, and as a bonus I'll give a free copy of my book to whoever can say what movie quote inspired the naming of this kitty (another hint: It was NOT from the movie "V FOR VENDETTA").
I don't believe this is a "happy ending", but a "New Beginning". The revolution has begun again and the cats conspire against one another and I try to remain neutral but with secret alliances with each party of their government, trying to maintain a level of control through subterfuge.
Cousette sees her new enemy…
V sees his quarry…
For a brief time, there is peace in Rossdonia!
Back to business…
Tonight I went to CONTEXT, a science fiction writing convention where HORRORS OF WAR played. It was a small crowd, but worth going for. I believe attending every screening possible and fostering a relationship with the audience is important. Even though anything to do with this movie annoys the hell out of me.
John Whitney & I worked on a new trailer for Horrors of War for the American Film Market. John did picture edit & I did the sound & music editing, just like last year. It was nauseating as I am completely sick of this movie and want desperately to move on. I believe my writer's block on the new script is intrinsically linked to still seeing and working on anything related to Horrors of War.
Last week Micah Jenkins and I attended the River City Film Festival. For a first year festival, they did everything right. There was a nice setup for filmmakers, the projection and sound were very well thought out and executed. Unfortunately, HORRORS OF WAR played last and I'm not sure what people were expecting, but the movie just plain didn't connect with this particular audience. Now anyone who works in the business long enough will know that sooner or later, your movie, no matter how good or bad will finally play for an audience that just doesn't get into it or maybe expectations were different.
This was the least fun screening for me and the Q&A afterwards cemented it. The first question of the night was "Why did you feel it necessary to denigrate the Jewish people by ignoring the Holocaust in your film? " … and the questions got worse from there. Let me start by saying that we are in no way disparaging the Jews or what they went through under the Nazi's, but we're not telling that story. I don't think any science fiction or horror story can possibly compare to the actual atrocities that took place, so why bother? Our story takes place before the Allies really commonly knew about concentration camps. Besides, they never touched on it in Saving Private Ryan either, so go get mad at Spielberg too.
If I needed any level of finality on my HORRORS OF WAR experience, that film festival audience did it for me. Sadly, I'll be in Michigan for the THRILLER! CHILLER! FILM FESTIVAL next weekend for a screening… again. At least this time we'll be playing to our target audience.
The book is doing well. I finally got a physical copy of the 6"x 9" update to the book. Oh yeah, it's definitely better. Since my last update, I had Dan Kiely check out the update and he had a great comment. In the last draft, I ended to book with how I made BACK OFFICE, then NEW WORLD. As Dan so eloquently pointed out, I ended to book with kind of a downer since NEW WORLD is really for me "How Not to Make a Movie". He said I should add the making of HORRORS OF WAR. Well, it's not exactly a short story. In the smaller, pocket sized paperback book, the abridged HORRORS OF WAR story took up 58 new pages. More pages = Higher Cost of the book. I then converted this over to the 6x9 book with bigger pictures, bigger, more legible font, and shaved 20 pages and can keep the price at $10 per book. Seeing it in the larger format, and HELL YEAH! It looks so damn cool. I have my own book I wrote. That's still cool to me. I don't see this losing its luster anytime soon.
I may be working on someone else's feature at the end of this month. I'm in negotiation to direct on this HD feature for someone and we'll see how that goes. More on that when there's more to report.
The script has not been writing itself, hard as I might hope that it would. My plans this week to write were derailed by Spaz' passing. I have not been in the right frame of mind to write comedy. Go figure. I think the damn of writer's block will soon end. V is already on my lap as I write this and I find my heart lifted from despair. Perhaps this new family dynamic will help the divine inspiration find it's mark. That and a visit from George Caleodis next week….
Thanks again acolytes. The Boo has heard your well wishings and is pleased.
-PJR
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DRINK IT UP! www.Sonnyboo.com
October 3rd, 2006
Casualties of War
For those who tune into this blog for filmmaking stuff, go ahead & skip on for the next time. Today I am distraught and it's purely personal.
In our humble abode, dubbed "Rossdonia", I have written on several occasions of Brandy's two cats, Cousette and Spaz, a brother & sister pair of mixed breeds. The reality is that in the past 4 and a half years, they have become just as much my cats too. I mostly work from home & I spend virtually every day with them. Even when I work a 14 hour day, they are not ignored when I get home, or when I sleep.
As I documented in the blogs of the past, when I do spend so much time at home, I would play with the cats on most days. Whether it was mock-trials where we determined who was guilty for the hairballs on the floor and the punishments would range from 15 minutes in the "pillows of persecution" (cushions from the couch & chairs) where a jailbreak was soon to erupt into the cats' favorite part of the day – "CHASE GAME"! I do have a strict policy of hugs & kisses after all games and I do enforce it. In case anyone misunderstood my entire history of the "Feline/Human Wars", it was a joke and it was what I do to entertain myself during the day with my two willing playmates – Cousette and Spaz.
I had very begrudgingly grown to love the cats. I am a dog person and have been my entire life. I never liked cats. When Brandy & I first started seeing each other, I was not inclined to take her cats in when we moved in together. First and foremost, I was allergic. We took the cats in at the old house on Indianola aka Rossdom, and they stayed in the basement. The first night I pet them and played with them, my eyes puffed up to the point where I couldn't see even when my eyes were "open". Their staying with us was supposed to be temporary, and they were meant to be confined to the basement during their stay. That lasted about a week before they were everywhere in the house & claiming a place in everyone's heart.
Spaz was anti-social. He's the black boy cat and let's face it, kinda ugly and not everyone's favorite. Combine that with the fact that he was not the sharpest tool in the shed, and Spaz was outcast. Cousette on the other hand is a very pretty, and very outgoing cat that loves company & loves to be pet. When people see them, they always comment on "She's such a pretty kitty", and no one says a word about Spaz. It took some time, but I got in there with Spaz. After a few months of seeing this unfairness, I made it my own personal mission in life to make Spaz feel special. In the same way that I see some people are not almost invisible in the crowd, I'll make a stupid nickname, or put a "the" in front of their name so that other people will notice them, I started to make Spaz feel special. Before we moved from the house on Indianola, I just randomly started calling Spaz "BATMAN" and got excited whenever he came in the room. I don't think anyone ever got excited when he came in the room, so it took a few weeks for him to warm up to it, and he even started thinking his name was BATMAN.
That nickname passed, and variations of his name Spaz took the form of "Spazociter", "Mr. Spaz Anderson" (a play on the "Mr. Anderson from the matrix movies, said in the Agent Smith voice for effect), "Spaz-dork", and so on. Regardless, it was always some kind of greeting every single day, sometimes more than once a day.
I have a semi-normal routine every day. I get up and go down to my computer & check my email. En route, Spaz is either on the couch behind me, in bed with me, or soon to be at my legs and wanting his greeting I had trained him to want. I never denied it to him. Even after I go to lunch or go to a job during the day, even if I was only gone for an hour, Spaz would get excited to see me return home. He would wake up from his fat lump spot and want to have his attention.
The last two years, here at this place, where Brandy and I have labored to make a home, Spaz found a peace and happiness he never had before. He was never miserable, but Spaz was obviously at his most jovial. He was not running away from house guests, and he even would go up to strangers that came in because his self confidence had grown. Spaz had in the past chewed or scratched hair off parts of his body from itches. He always had patches of hair missing, but since we moved here, his fur was thick and clean. Spaz was happy.
Last week, I noticed Spaz had started to have labored breathing. It was subtle and you could only hear it if you put your head up against him. Every day it got a little worse, but sometimes a little better. We held off on taking him to the vet because we hoped it was small & would get better over time, but Brandy & I are not financially well off, so a vet visit is too expensive.
Sunday morning, I had to go do work at Tavares Teleproductions and had to leave the house at some point. I did my morning routine and I noticed Spaz had no left my bed. He was too tired. After I took a shower, he got to the top of the steps and I sat down & played with him. He was particularly playful, rolled on his back. Spaz's ultimate sign of affection was to play-bite and he bit me several times and loved being toyed with.
I got home a little bit after 11:00PM Sunday night and Spaz came downstairs to see me, but his breath was much labored. I pet him on his head and then held him like a baby, and rubbed his belly to calm him down. Brandy came home a few minutes later and we immediately decided to take him to the emergency vet. I checked online and found the nearest 24 hour place. I drove and Brandy was to hold Spaz. Spaz is a house cat and does NOT go outside. When we've taken him with us to get the mail on the front porch, we squirms and panics, so we knew a car ride was going to be brutal. It was.
Spaz panicked and his breathing got even more erratic. We drove as fast as we could only to find the facility closed. This was traumatic enough without these asshole mis-advertising. We were in the car with no alternate place to go so I tried calling friends, but my cell phone minutes ran out. We pull into the E.R. of St. Annes human hospital. I hold Spaz while Brandy runs into the E.R. to find another place. I held Spaz close to me, held him like a baby and just talked to him. His breathing eased some, but he was still not good, and worse than at home. Brandy got directions and we were off again as I handed him back to her.
We find the other place nearly 20 minutes later and get Spaz into emergency care. We sit in the waiting room awaiting any kind of news for over an hour, hoping for the best. A Vet asks us all kinds of questions about Spaz and tell us that he's still very panicked and scared, so until the sedative kicks in they can't get X-rays to find out what the problem is. More waiting. Knowing Spaz, I assume it will be a long while. We left unprepared, so I volunteer to go home & grab some things for our vigil. I also wanted to see Cousette because she & Spaz have never been separated before.
I cried in the car, but we were pretty close to home. I start to grab things when Brandy calls. She said she got an update. Spaz is in an oxygen tank and they gave him some steroids to open up his lungs and he was stable. They wanted to keep him overnight, but we could see him. When I got back there, Brandy had a partial bill that exceeded $1,000 already and the estimate to keep Spaz the next day was over $2,000 more. Our only other option was to transport him to another vet when they opened at 8:00AM because by 8:30AM, when there was a shift change, we'd have to pay the new balance.
They gave us a list of other vets in the area and phone numbers. We could go back & see Spaz. We went to see him and there he was in this cold, sterile room in a little clear box getting oxygen pumped in. My heart sunk seeing him in there. He was alert and awake, and immediately recognized us. Brandy reached in the hand hole and pet his head & I his back. Brandy asked if I wanted to pet his head & so I did. I put my face down into the hole and talked to Spaz and he got up with all his strength and reached his little face out and kissed me. He tried to get out of this little hole and come to us, but they started to close the hand holes. I couldn't hold back my tears at all. I broke down.
We left together utterly shaken. We came home and tried with futility to sleep. With maybe an hour to an hour and a half of sleep, we went back to the emergency vet's at 7:45AM to start prepping for the transporting of Spaz to another facility. The vet told us that he had a good chance and that Spaz might come through. They sedated him so that the drive wouldn't be so bad. Brandy and I switched so that she would drive and I would hold Spaz. When they brought him to me, he was so out of it and still breathing very hard. I wrapped him in a blanket and we hauled ass to the first vet open we had called. It was the longest drive of my life as I talked to Spaz and held him close. He put his little paws on my face, reaching out to me as I talked softly to him the entire drive. I held him like a baby as I often did at the front window, rubbing his tummy and talking to him about anything, the first time I met him, about games we played, anything to keep him calm and it seemed to work, except he was getting more and more labored.
We got there to a place on Morse Rd. that wasn't very advanced or anything. They spent 5 minutes with him and said, they were not equipped to handle this. He needed an oxygen tank and special care they weren't capable of. They gave us directions to another facility and we were off. We get to this other place about a mile and half away, and they take him right back. Within 15 minutes, their vet had looked over Spaz and reviewed all the info from the emergency vet and told us that they would continue the therapy started at the E.R. and see what could be done. In a few hours she'd call and let us know how he's responding.
After seeing how Spaz looked, I think we both knew in our hearts that Spaz was going. He was trying so hard to breathe. Our brave little boy was too far gone. The vet called us and said he was more alert, and had gotten better, but was not really improved on breathing. We got in the car & went to see him.
Poor little Spaz was breathing so heavy and it looked exhausting and we knew we had to let him go. We had come to say goodbye to our little boy Spaz. We told the doctor it was time and they took us into a private room. I carried him in, holding him and telling him that I loved him. I didn't think I could even be there in the room when he passed. I gave him to Brandy to hold and say her goodbyes too. I was going to leave the room, when I turned my back on Spaz, he cried out & reached his little paws out to me. I couldn't leave him then. I pet him on the head and Brandy held on to him when the doctor made the injection. We felt his little body go limp and the doctor took him. Curled in a ball, exactly as he spent most of his days on the couch or on my lap, or on Brandy's, that's how he looked when he left us.
We couldn't go home just yet, so Brandy and I went to the park where we go often. We tried to remember everything good and pure that we ever knew about Spaz. What occurred to me then was something I never realized. I have spent my whole life trying to create a surrogate family, or join one. My own relations with my family are estranged at best. Brandy to her own family is not that different. What we had created together was a family. We live together, we treat her cats as our kids and everything really was familial for us. I had not thought of it in those terms until Spaz passed. We're family and we lost one of our own.
We came home after the walk. The house seems so much emptier. It didn't help that they were working on the roof, so the electric was supposed to be off for a few hours. I tried to sleep in my bed, but the thought that Spaz was not jumping on the bed drove sleep from my mind. Later I tried sleeping on the couch, but then the realization that never once did I nap on this couch without Spaz with me kept sleep from starting.
Brandy had to work at 6:00PM, so she left, brave as she could be, and I was left alone with Cousette. Cousette hasn't figured it out yet, but she's looking at all of Spaz' spots. She started crying and howling, so I just pet her and talked to her. She doesn't understand. They've never been apart, so it's slowly dawning on her that she's alone and he's not coming back.
I have the notice from the Condo association clearly stating that the power would be off from 10:00AM till "no later than 2:00PM". It was 10:45:PM when the lights came on. I spent several hours in the dark, alone with my misery. I wanted to try to distract myself, anything to keep my mind from losing my friend, my boy, Spaz. I can't ask Brandy not to work, plus we would have both been stuck in the dark. It compounded my sorrow and I miss him so much. When Brandy got home, she left work early and came home because she was so distraught. Spaz and Cousette had been with her since their birth and he was 10 years old. Brandy couldn't sleep. It's still very deep.
In the end, I made several realizations. When I set out to make Spaz feel special, it was for no real reason. I had told the little bugger several times that I loved him over the years, especially the last year or two. What I didn't know was how much he loved me back. He was a part of my daily life for 4 and half years. I didn't take him for granted, but that doesn't really ease my pain. Brandy's still very shook up.
I've faced death of people that were close to me. In the years since, I have built up buffers and emotional barriers to prevent me from feeling like this. I don't know how, but Spaz cracked my armor. I've let Brandy and the cats form a family of our own and together we have made a happy home. Here, it was a four way street. Our mutual love of each other made the spirit of our home a happy one. Without our buddy Spaz, it's a little less happy.
Today I started my routine, but there is a hollowness that I have not known in many years. He's not on the couch or in my bed. Brandy left for work and Cousette and I are alone. Today is the first day without Spaz. It seemed like such a small thing, but what it really is to me is a little hole in my heart where Spaz used to be.
Many thanks to those who called and emailed us with your condolences. It has meant a lot to us and we're glad you've shown your care. To those who knew Spaz, I'm sure you meant a lot to him too. The last years of his life were very happy, and that's the best gift you can give to anyone or anything.
- Peter John Ross
Sept. 17th, 2006
Pancakes & Parables
Last night I worked at a Hotel. I was filling in helping out my buddy so he could have a night off. I was the A/V tech on duty so that I could just baby sit a DVD player during a wedding. Excitement Central, that’s where I was last night, at least I was able to get some thoughts down.
During a break, I had my handy dandy laptop. I was tweaking the book I’m writing, Tales from the Front Line of Indie Filmmaking. I started a little organization of my files, and I found 3 articles I forgot about, namely the Making of The Manhattan Project that I was asked to write for a website I can’t recall, and the Making of New World parts 1 and 2 that I wrote for The DogPile filmmaking site. This added 20 pages to the book. When I got home, I added a few pics to jazz these stories up. I didn’t know if I should put these at the head of the book or the tail. I chose the tail so that people can read the articles & other Tales, and then see how I really started.
I tweaked the book until 3:00AM and played with it. I found this new site, LuLu.com, that self publishes the book for $5 cheaper per book than Cafepress.com does. I’m getting a few copies made so that I can send them off to publishers already in book form. In the meantime, I’ll sell a few copies here and there on the site. I get a discount if I buy 36 or more, so I’ll order 30 for my own needs and sales.
Still not much happens with the next feature script. I can’t focus on it. I’m at least starting to figure out what’s wrong. I'm obviously pushing my shoot for a bit. I have some funding to help book a name actor or two. At some point in October, I'd like to get all my principals in a room & figure out when & how we're going to make the movie.
The script is coming along, but much slower than I'd like. I've made some progress, but obviously not as much as I'd hoped. I get some occasional inspirations and I write them down, but still no massive script writing sessions. Now I'm in money making mode (like the gig last night). I'm dedicated, but I want my next project to excel and be better than anything I've done, but I think the added self imposed pressure is killing me creatively.
Things are still moving with Horrors of War, but at least it’s not me doing the work. The film has its own momentum now. I keep either finding film festivals or some of them contact me to let us know that it was accepted. We’re up to 11 film fests and rising slowly. I can officially say that we’re with Maverick Entertainment for the DVD release, but it won’t be on DVD in the U.S. until sometime in 2007. Phil did find a DVD cover from one of the sites that scanned the Netherlands DVD art. I made a Poster Gallery on the site, also Phil’s idea.
We’ve got an invite to the Thriller!Chiller! Film Festival in Michigan and that one sounds like a LOT of fun. John Whitney and I are definitely going. I don’t want to see the movie again, but I don’t mind talking about it afterwards.
Showing the Directors’ Cut of Horrors of War is an interesting sales tool. There are some out there that question the logic of screening a version of the film that will NOT be on DVD. This is not a bad thing, it’s a good thing. That means people who see it on the festival tour will have a reason to rent or watch the movie again because it’s different. If they didn’t like the movie, they have a reason to give it another chance. It makes the screenings “special” and the DVD release something to still look forward to for any fans out there too. It’s not rocket science, kids.
I have agreed to speak at the next IndieClub Columbus meeting September 24th, 2006 1pm to 4pm at Dublin branch of the Columbus Metro Library 75 N. High Street Dublin, OH 43017. I really don’t like to attend these local meetings, for IndieClub or Columbus Movie Club. There’s not much there for me. It’s for people like I used to be, where I used to be. I don’t find I’d get much out of the meetings myself. After all I had been through with the Columbus Film Consortium, I find that the social aspects and the behavior of local filmmakers (and filmmaker wannabes), to be anti-productive for making movies. It brings out the worst in me too. I’m not that unaware of my own bad habits and terrible inhibitions when it comes to local moviemaking clashes. The metaphor I’m using is this: An alcoholic does not go to bars once or twice a month with his old drinking buddies.
I was asked to speak about “Reel” and how to make them, why you make them, and show a few. It was no small motivation that since Brandy is working so much with two full time jobs that I’m showing her Reel because she can’t be there. I miss my Brandy-Weasel and I miss Spoooooooooooons. The least I can do is try to help get her some acting work when things slow down for her. I’ve also got 2 of Greg Sabo’s Director of Photography Reels I edited to show.
I’ve also got my two updated Reels to show. The Commercial Reel hadn’t been touched in almost 3 years. I never made a “Director’s Reel”, but I needed to because I’m getting ready to solicit a real agent. We’re zooming in on the time for me to try my hand at the bigger league. After putting an initial cut of my Director’s Reel online, I got some feedback from several places and I shortened it, whilst adding almost double the material. Dan Kiely even kicked in with the suggestion to shorten a clip he was in. I did. The less Dan Kiely on my Reel, the better I’ll do, that much is certain.
I’ve been tossing around the idea of offering the service of editing Reels for actors for over a year, but I have this fear of a poor reaction from people or several amateur wannabes offering the same service for free or cheaper, even though they won’t have the same level of professionalism. I think I’ll start anyway. I’m not trying to win a popularity contest. I need to make money these days and I’m worth every penny. I’ve been underselling myself for far too long.
The cats are in upheaval. With Brandy’s less frequent time spent here at Rossdonia, they are becoming rebellious. They have taken to coughing up the hairballs everywhere and more often. I believe Coussette is behind these new terrorist attacks. We will strike down the evil doers and smoke them out of their caves.
I’ve got a few paid edit sessions this coming week, doing an interview for someone’s documentary, a new editing class session, and 2 more video production jobs this coming week. This is a good thing. I’m going to make some money and alleviate some of my tribulations so that I can focus on the writing of a feature length screenplay that I will shoot sometime in 2007…
Peace Out Sonnyboo-Homees,
Peter John Ross
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DRINK IT UP! www.Sonnyboo.com
Sept. 5th, 2006
Days of Futures Past
Im in a state of flux right now. Not everything feels like it should and I have a general discomfort and Im not 100 ure where it emanates from. Definitely writers block contributing to this, but thats not all. The world and specifically my world is off-kilter in the now.
I got a car again. Its a Chevy Blazer. As most people who know will guess, its not exactly a perfect fit with me. I dont look right in a Blazer, but who cares? Im mobile again. Its weird to be able to go where ever I want whenever I want. Its been a while. I waited until the right circumstance hit and Im glad I did.
Some money has filtered back into my life from commercial work, so that has helped a lot. Ive started teaching my editing class and this past weekend on Sunday I even tried something new a one day editing seminar in Cleveland. What was risky for me was to drive the new automobile all the way to Cleveland. I had paranoia because the last 3 trips prior to Cleveland have all resulted in a car that had problems.
I think Im better at teaching my class now than ever before. I have more experience (thanks Captain Obvious!), but I have also gotten more streamlined on the information and how I put it out there. I used a lot more video in my presentation than ever before and I put the Laptop through its paces since this wasnt taught at a studio, but rather at TALKIES, a coffee bar in downtown Cleveland. In actuality, this worked out great. I used the Laptop as a DVD player, and also as an editor to demonstrate editing a scene from a movie from the raw footage. I have another paranoia (I am neurotic after all) after doing any kind of public speaking where I think I did terrible. I become needy & want feedback if I sucked or not. Luckily, several of the students emailed me and said they enjoyed it, including 4 gentlemen who drove up from Kentucky for this.
I crashed at Johnny Wus so I could sneak a peak at some footage from his feature THE RAPTURE. He wasnt feeling well, at least not until he started showing the clips and he got animated and excited. Johnny said he could barely stay awake, but then after showing footage we chatted for a few hours.
Yesterday, I made a side stop in Wadsworth Ohio where I grew up. This is the one place I consider my hometown. I was there from age 5-12 and most of my fondest memories reside in this place and that time. This was before our family moved to El Paso Texas where I feel that I was raped of my childhood by circumstance and my own ignorance. I get a great deal of solace from visiting Wadsworth, even today. Nearby our old house was The Woods and this is now an official city park. Half of the park now has formal cement paths and a parking lot, plus a small pond where I nearly drowned 20 years ago is now a sanctioned, real pond with benches and everything. I detest the revised part of the park, but the majority of it remains unfettered by time and conservatism.
The last time I was here, a few months ago, I went through the modern & sanitized part of the park, hating every moment of it until I found the paths still lead to a more wild, un-cemented and less traveled part. This time I started at the opposite end of the park, nearer to where my old home used to be. I found my way to the northern most part and wandered about. I have grown so much older. Its been 22 years since I lived here and yet I found that I left a part of my soul in this place, in these trees and hills. I found that there are parallels to that time of my life and this time of my life. I am happier now than I have ever been since that era. Im struggling to maintain this happiness and trudge forward into the future too. This little journey into my past has given me a great deal of hope and I look forward now, eyes open, first foot out.
I want more spoons. Brandy wont give them to me. Shes working two jobs and well over 50 hours a week. Spooning is not sexual; its more a form of torture in a sense. I am not a touchy feely person, but because Brandy hates spooning, it makes me want to do it all the time. Brandy is small. See this Brandy? YOURE SMALL. Youre a tiny little thing and I want to spoon soon, so get home damn it.
I have become a good friend to SPAZ ANDERSON, the black cat. He and I have formed an unholy alliance against COUSETTE, the pretty 6 toed cat in the house. We have a boys room and shes not allowed in. We have special hand shakes and secret codes just to make her feel left out. She can go play with Brandy and they can make a girls room while we continue our manly excursions. Take that ladies!
The commercial demo reel as been updated with more recent projects (since Ive made about 12 new commercials since the last edit), plus I made a first cut of a Directors Reel, for my more artistic endeavors. I intend to use this to get more directing work and an agent at some point, although Im not sure when at this point. I put these reels on both YouTube and MySpace for all to see in higher res than even my own site.
SEVEN SAMURAI CRITERION 3 DVD set came out today. For anyone looking for cinema history, Akira Kurasawas master piece film demonstrates everything you need to know in film. I bought the single disc Criterion DVD a few years ago based solely on Steven Spielberg saying he watches his 35mm film print of this movie the day before every shoot hes ever done. George Lucas, Francis Ford Coppola, Martin Scorsese, & John Milius all swear by Kurasawa and specifically Seven Samurai. I might have to pick up the new 3 DVD version soon. Its too enticing.
I also broke down last week and bought the triple-dip LORD OF THE RINGS DVDs that got re-released. I already have 2 sets of each, but this 3rd set has all new feature length documentaries on each of the movies that are unseen. Overall, they arent that great, but I bought them for so cheap, it was worth it to me and wont be too many consumers. I dont recommend them unless you are fanatical (like me).
In the month since my last blog entry, I have tried many things to spot writers block. One of the things I did was re-visit an idea that was brought to me by a publisher. Having read my articles online and some of this very blog, I was approached by a publishing company to potentially write a book. They wanted my sardonic approach to writing and the perspective of going from DV shorts to feature filmmaking. Of course the caveat was to see how well Horrors of War does, so at least they were honest. Since Horrors of War is due out in the near future, it was time to look into a compilation of the articles and flesh out a bigger piece.
In doing so, I started to reminisce about more sad stories that had happened to me as well as more articles. I made a test pressing of the first draft because I am a tactile person. Touching & feeling the book did make me write a lot more. I did several updates, drafts, and several new stories and articles emerged. One far more important aspect added was asking Dan Kiely to do illustrations for the book for the caricatures. These added so much vibrancy & light to the book. The book is coming along fantastically, if I do say so myself. There is some genuine insight into the real process of making DV movies and how to prepare for making bigger, more accessible films. Its really a book with 2 parts. The first are the straight to the point articles which are advice driven, although occasionally sarcastic, but in bite sized nuggets of information. The other half are personal stories, many of which are partially found on this blog, and the rest have not yet been told in a public forum.
I actually have managed to get pages of the script written. Ive started over with a page one re-write, meaning I have jettisoned almost everything written by the other writers, at least the exact words written. I will maintain much of what they did in spirit, but the dialogue is almost entirely new. I just let the characters start talking, but I keep writing myself into a corner. What sucks about this particular bout with writers block is that its not normal & unlike any other Ive come up against. I already HAVE the entire outline of the story done. There are plots, sub-plots, even nuggets of dialogue written in the outline, but I just cant get the groove to start. I cant go for more than a few pages at a time. It just isnt there. I cant explain it.
Johnny Wu has hit on a theory that I tend to agree with. He said I have too many loose ends. My spirit is not at peace and I cant focus until I clear my head. This ties into the intro to this little journal entry. I am un focused and it is because there are still loose ends on Horrors of War, Brandy and I have had a tiff or two recently, both of their own accord & also because of my own frustrations carrying into the relationship, plus I have not been getting as much freelance work & the money isnt coming in like it used to.
Ive already made the conscious decision to push any kind of shoot for this dark comedy until the spring. I will not commit to shooting a feature until I am 100appy with the script. I wont make the same mistake Ive made with some of my short films & make the movie before the foundation has been made rock solid. After the trip to Wadsworth yesterday, making out with Brandy last night, and making some money, I may be able to crack the writing nut a bit more this week.
Until next time, my precious Acolytes. Until Next Time.
Peter John Ross
P.S. No politics this time, but to celebrate the 1 year anniversary of Katrina
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DRINK IT UP! www.Sonnyboo.com
August 10th, 2006
AUTUMN MUSINGS & DISCONTENTMENT
This past weekend I attended the Indie Gathering in Cleveland. Friday night, John Whitney and I screened Horrors of War to a decent sized crowd. On Saturday, we had a table and sold some DVD’s of our short films. John Whitney’s SOLVE FOR X outsold me, but that shouldn’t be a shock. It’s a killer short film (now on YOUTUBE itself).
We started off on a panel on the “Director’s Role on a Film”, and that was fun. Johnny Wu, John Whitney, and I had a fun time. Later in the day I moderated a “writing the modern screenplay” panel, even though I’m not much of a screenwriter. I did tell a story about something you shouldn’t do in a screenplay. I saw a short film where they had a girl floating on a lake. These arms reached up and grabbed her, and pulled her down. Then they cut to a girl waking up from a dream. She goes downstairs and she says,” Mom, I just had the most horrible dream. I was floating on a lake, and these arms pulled me down…” I’m so glad she said those lines because, gee, I was so confused as to which dream she was talking about, Captain Obvious. Films are a SHOW ME medium, not a TELL ME medium. This story got many laughs.
Since I’m describing this same filmmaker, let me just say that we enter into the realm of local movie world insanity. On a blog not unlike this one, a local filmmaker I like to call FADE INTO OBLIVION, tried to out as many as 7 local filmmakers & their productions. The ravings of this madman went so far as to say the basically out of every interaction he’s had with local filmmakers, every single one of them went bad, and every single one of these was not his fault. As someone infamous once said, when you have a string of bad relationships, they all have something in common – YOU.
Now my own dealings with this nut job are well chronicled on this blog, but what is amazing are the new stories that have emerged and the breadth of FADE INTO OBLIVION’s interactions. It turns out there’s a recurring theme to his Adventures in Storytelling. He says he has all kinds of experience, works on a movie, usually for a maximum of 1-2 days, then bails, after leaving a trail of disappointment because his abilities did not equal the promise.
The reality is that FADE INTO OBLIVION is not a bad person per se. He just has a serious problem with reality. When he writes a blog, he condescends to everyone, and specifically bashes on them for just being DV filmmakers with the experience of listening to commentary tracks, but guess what? That’s all he’s got. We’re not even going to get into the blatant lies about his jobs and history in the mid 1990’s when he would have been a teenager.
It’s just another drama unfolding in the local film community. If anyone in the actual film industry pays attention, then it’s pretty obvious they are more bored than anyone in the Midwest. They could also stand to spend a little more time ranting & raving about their own issues.
I’ve self published my first pressing of my book. Thanks to a few reminders and also the blatant idiocy around me at times and I’ve got revisions to make. It’s going to end up at around 200 pages, although I’m hoping to interview someone for the book in a few weeks. It helps to have the real book in my hands. Touching it has broken one level of writer’s block, just not for the script.
I’ve got a solid outline. There’s plots, subplots, individual jokes, several lines, and yet… no script. I can’t do it. I’m not a writer. It’s starting to get testy in my realm. I want to scream and kick, but then I just get online & kill some Nazi ass with ENEMY TERRITORY and then I feel better, but no script.
On the darkest side of my soul, I feel the creepy crawlies as I see the world in the Middle East crumble. I’ve never been to Israel, but I spent time in Middle East, unlike most Americans. I have the highest regard & respect for the Islamic faith. It’s the only religion that has rigorously maintained its integrity by saying “You may not change a word!”, whereas a Christian bible from 1980 varies greatly from one printed in 2006.
I love the Jon Stewart. As my great friend Maurice taught me, it’s better to get the facts filtered in a humorous way. Now even then I have seen things that made me cringe at the same time too. I saw a debate between Gov. George Bush circa 2000 debate President Bush circa 2003-2006, and the contradictions (as in complete lies) and it was enlightening. Then seeing something I thought was brand new, horrifying news, wound up being from March and no one seems to care. Bush met with Tony Blair several months before the war & discussed the start date whether there were Weapons of Mass Destruction or not. That makes everything done in the war so far a lie and the truest motives are despicable. The latest in the long list of lies is the canceling of Stem cell Research saying its murder and that every life is precious, but then to keep the killing spree in Iraq on high for low moral reasons. I guess the only lives that matter are white Christians.
My Sexy Veronica ™ will be most proud of my public proclamations in the political arena, but the world is changing and it’s going into a very dark place. I’m feeling melancholy, I’m feeling concern, and I felt compelled to say something today.
-Peter John Ross
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DRINK IT UP! www.Sonnyboo.com
July 19th, 2006
Crossroads
One thing’s for sure. I’ve grown. Controversies abound with the local filmmaker wannabe’s and I won’t make a peep. There’s more drama than a high school play and I have little or nothing to do with it and I will NOT participate. I have far more important things on my plate. I have choices; I can either work hard on my new script or get into it with talk-a-lot blowhards. I think I’d rather write. I can comment on the sexual preferences of a well known local actor or I can do an interview about HORRORS OF WAR. I think it best to do the Interview. Did this actress have an affair with a married local actor, thus ending a 5 and half year marriage or should we discuss the merits of shooting HD over film?
One of my most avid readers of this blog asked me how life after HORRORS OF WAR is and I said I had an Interview with Markee magazine on Monday and a Horror magazine on Wednesday. Let’s just say it’s not easy to put it behind me when there’s so much left to do and no one to do it.
We’re getting solicited to submit to film festivals. Just this week I’ve fielded offers from a festival in Toronto Canada and another in Phoenix Arizona. Entry fees get waived, and I drop the packages quickly in the post. I think once we get formal announcements, we’ll do the festival run through November of this year, then shift focus to the DVD release in North America. Yes, that’s right – HORRORS OF WAR on DVD this year, at least as it stands now. Things may change, the release might get bumped back, but I think it’s going to hit on schedule this fall.
As I think about it, it was one year ago today we were on set and I was directing on HORRORS OF WAR. Consulting my shooting schedule, we were in Mechanicsburg shooting the Chateau exteriors, where we shot & killed Brandy at least 8 times in a row. It doesn’t feel like a year ago, but it was.
Since my last blog, I was on set at Johnny Wu’s feature shoot for THE RAPTURE. Johnny Wu is a talented guy who surrounds himself with good people. The crew, unlike many Columbus shoots, is not half-assing it waiting for their turn to direct, convinced they could do it better.
Other than that, it was a wonder to see Brandy acting in the film, especially in very very provocative outfits that reveal much and hid little. Gee, thanks Christine for making my girlfriend the object of attention for every erect penis in the state of Ohio for 2 weeks. Actually, yet again, I don’t experience jealousy. I don’t mind because it’s me she’s coming home to, so there’s no bother. I trust her implicitly, no matter whom the guys are and how much they try.
I worked with actors ever so briefly on the movie and found that I still have this burning desire to work with actors all the time. Finding ways to deliver lines differently and that director/actor relationship that I’ve learned to cultivate, even quickly. The real truth is I hate being a director on someone else’s set. All I want to do is get the hell out of there because I feel this conflict of interest being there with no real job duties to perform. If I were a grip or a camera operator or anything, it wouldn’t be bad, but I detest being asked to “help” on a movie and have no real function.
I’m certain Johnny Wu will edit together something really nice from the piece. He’s a master at culling together footage & making magic from it. I find him to be one of the most capable filmmakers in the state.
Writer’s block sucks. I hate losing the ability put thoughts on paper and the aimless floating from one menial task to another while awaiting inspiration to kick in. At least at this phase in my life, I can find something productive to do in the mean time. I always fill in that time with hard core marketing.
I just got on YOUTUBE.COM after spending a year aware of it, but not being too excited to add yet another video site to my resume. I also joined METACAFE.COM
. I split my efforts between the 5 best short films I feel I have and 5 video clips regarding HORRORS OF WAR. I’ve spent over a year promoting nothing but HORRORS OF WAR and not focusing on my singular directing career and short films. Since it was just a few minutes work, I put forth only the works I feel best represent me and put those out there, plus the best material for HORRORS OF WAR as a whole.
I’m not too excited because every year short film and video sites come up and go down. It could be a full time job riding the trends and keeping up. I rode the first wave of sites in 1999-2000 and only 3 sites still stand – Ifilm.com, AtomFilms.com, and Undergroundfilm.org. Even sites like Pop.com from Steven Spielberg & Ron Howard never lasted. FilmFilm.com from Nora Ephron closed its virtual doors. I have not been keeping up on the trends and newer sites. It’s too much work to be 1 in several thousand. I’ve done enough with the short films and I want to keep my focus sharply towards feature filmmaking endeavors for now. This little diversion into YOUTUBE.COM is not a lasting thing.
I’m going to be writing not only dialogue polishes on my next feature script, but I’m trying to hammer out a longer article that I’ve had in mind, but not written for over a year. A follow up to the ever popular FILM FLAMS & SCAMS, as part of the INDIE FILM CLICHÉ series of articles I wrote will be cathartic to write.
That’s all for now folks. I must keep typing and on things other than a Blog. Plus I just picked up Steven Spielberg’s AMAZING STORIES season one DVD set and can’t wait to get 23 minute nuggets of great entertainment.
Good Night and Good Suck,
Peter John Ross, evil boss of John Fromes, now a documentarian under my thumb
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DRINK IT UP! www.Sonnyboo.com
July 1st, 2006
CODA
Well, by completely random means, I found the Japanese DVD cover for Horrors of War online. There is an import site selling it, but the DVD is region 2 (meaning not playable on most U.S. players). The image for the cover gives me mixed feelings. I think it’s very very professionally done, but I don’t know if I like it. I need to see it in my hands & I’ll determine if I dig it or not. For $50, I better like it a lot…
Shortly after, I found a site that streams the Windows Media Player video of the Japanese trailer (CLICK HERE)
. Now they used entirely their own music and cut their own trailer from scratch. It’s a decent trailer, and I absolutely LOVE the voice over in Japanese. No, I have absolutely NO CLUE what it says, but I love it anyway. It sounds like all the Kurasawa trailers, but they might be saying, “These stupid Americans made this awful movie that you MUST see!”.
What I really really need to know is if they name translated. I many cases Japanese translations aren’t even close to the original titles. “Horrors of War” might translate to “Nazi Super Death Monkeys Die Die Die”. I asked a friend to see if his Japanese wife will convert the words for me.
On another front, one I’ll be intentionally vague about, we have finally got to the final laps of North American distribution. I won’t say with whom or any real details, as it’s NOT final until they tell me it’s final, but I will say that we’re in the final stages and contracts are signed, but there’s still some formalities and paperwork to be done before it’s “done”.
I was relieved and excited until I realized how much work was left to be done. #1, I had to get a few minor tweaks to the DigiBeta master tape. We had missed several names in the end credits that have since been corrected for the screenings, but not on the master tape. Also, from the directors’ cut, I wanted to insert (meaning overwrite) 5 shots in the cemetery battle scene that I found crucially important.
Now, I was asked if I was going to try to sneak the directors’ cut in on the master tape. No, I did not and I won’t. I will not deny I disagree with the cut being released, but this is a TEAM decision and I won’t piss off or backstab my executive producer over a disagreement.
Maybe one day the Directors’ Cut will see a DVD release, but as of now, the old, non-linear edit is what will be released this fall (tentatively). I have mixed feelings on the matter. On one hand, I know the Directors’ Cut tells a better story, but I agree that for some people in the audience, it’s less about story and much more about “more guns, more monsters, more explosions”, so we lose some people, but get others. It’s not entirely a wash, but an acceptable one.
We’re in a mad rush to copy paperwork, get new contracts signed, and also edit together the last of the “WebDocs” and extras for the DVD release. I can guarantee that some are going to be WEB ONLY as there is no where near enough room on the single disc edition of Horrors of War that is now being planned. If we’re lucky (and in my dreams) in a few years, if there is interest, we have plenty of material for a 2 disc special edition. Maybe Horrors of War will take off (possible…) or maybe one of the people involved, like John Whitney, or one of the actors will get big, not now, but within a few years.
We taped the final interviews recently at Ken Wilson’s house, with its cool suits of armor & eclectic sets of weapons. It made a perfect setting for the interviews. Ken & Deb are two of the coolest people on planet Earth, and I daresay any other worlds.
Now the race to finish documentaries is on. John Whitney is handling the bulk of the editing, but I’ll be there for the finishing process and an overall tweaking edit. The “WebDocs” and the entire “Making Of” videos are my pride & joy. I have taken no credit for producing and directing these, but they are my baby. They have been a labor of love. Editing these is like therapy, even when there’s stress. The stories of how we made this are great and everyone comes across so well, telling the tale as they saw it.
We are going to submit to film festivals and get Horrors of War out there a bit more. Now, this is NOT a “Sundance” film, so we won’t be wasting our time, their time, or someone’s money. However, there are a ton of genre based festivals and screening opportunities. There are Horror movie marathons, Science Fiction events, and Comic-book conventions, and multimedia presentations are getting more and more available. Think outside of the box, and you can find some alternate ways to get a fan for your film or a sale for your DVD.
As soon as we get approval, the machine will begin and the wheels will start to turn. I’ve always said that a feature film, if you want to be successful, is the long haul. It’s beyond full time and it’s so soul scraping that you can’t imagine the depths to which you have to go within yourself to keep going. No one’s success story ever started with, “I was burned out, then I stopped working it, and THEN I was a huge success!”
I spent the weekend with Brandy at rehearsals for Johnny Wu’s feature film THE RAPTURE. These were also wire-work and fight choreography rehearsal so it was fun. Now Brandy, in a rare move, pulled a practical joke on me with Andy Schofield. Everyone knows I love the Spoons. Brandy, hates spooning. This is NOT a sexual thing, only a huggy, lying down thing. Let’s face it Brandy hates touchy feely and neither am I, but her saying she hates it makes me want it. In a joking way, I made a proclamation in front of everyone that perhaps we needed a substitute “spooner”, preferably a young, very attractive Asian girl.
The 2nd day of rehearsals, they got an Asian girl to approach me while I was on my laptop, ensconced in a writing extravaganza. She said she talked to my girlfriend and was into whatever we wanted. I bought it hook line & sinker until she said she wanted $1,000, and I thought that was a little pricey for Spoons. Low and behold many were staring and laughing.
My freelance worked has picked up a big, thank God. I’ve been without money coming in for a while now and it feels good to have. I’ve recently started watching movies again and trying to get through a slew of “extended cuts” and “director’s cuts”, so far few of them have meant anything to me or added a lot. I did however see SUPERMAN RETURNS, and I must say that it not only evoked a spark of sense memories from 1978, but it hit some core emotions in all the right spots. I have no real criticisms of the movie, as I loved it. A perfect sequel/reboot of the Donner movie(s) this is. Even though more than 70% of Superman II was directed by Richard Donner, it’s credited to Richard Lester, which is practically a crime. The great & powerful Johnny Wu gave me the feature length Ken Burns documentary on the history of Superman (“Look Up In the Sky!”) and also the Jet Li masterpiece FEARLESS, which is one of the best movies I’ve seen this year.
I started teaching my editing class again for the first time in over a year. It was odd, but pretty easy to jump back in. I’ve got 8 students and they all seem pretty interested. I think I’m a better teacher now than I have ever been. I have my technique down & of course my metaphors. I love my metaphors. I’m armed now with better videos for demonstration and having the completed feature film cred doesn’t hurt. I think I’ll continue on with another session or two this year.
No news on the new feature film. I’m so bogged down on Horrors of War still and making money, there has been no progress. I am not thrilled, but it’s a fact of life. There will be progress, as I will be writing quite a bit in the next few weeks on tweaking the screenplay and making it the way I want it.
Today may just be a writing day… Brandy is off to work and I have little else to do and no movie really seems to jump out and say ‘WATCH ME TODAY DAMNIT!”, so if the muse comes to visit, I may have to tickle her inner thigh and hope that she lets me in.
God bless the Acolytes of Boo! Long live the Rockin’ Rangers of the SOnnyBoo Brigade
- Peter John Ross
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DRINK IT UP! www.Sonnyboo.com
